Making Love versus Having Sex
Both making love and having sex can be categorized as the same thing, in the sense that both involve consensual intimacy between two adults. But lovemaking requires a deeper connection and understanding between both parties. On the other hand, sex only requires the consent of two adults, who can be strangers. Couples in love can also have just sex in form of a quickie.
Making love elicits deep emotions that help lovers feel a deeper connection. It’s usually reserved for couples hoping to further commit to the relationship.
Casual sex partners can sometimes go beyond having sex when one of the partners initiates lovemaking. This creates tension between them as one doesn’t expect such a level of emotion. However, lovemaking isn’t exclusive to lovers. It just has to be properly managed to avoid unprecedented results.
Lovemaking doesn’t employ most of the features of sex. For example, talking dirty is a basic characteristic of sex. But lovemaking settles for romantic and affectionate conversations during sex.
How To Know If Your Partner Is In For Love Or Sex
The promise of love can open doors to several other rooms in a relationship, including intimacy. But how you know if your partner really loves you or is just there for the sex? Keep reading to find out.
You feel dissatisfied after sex
Physical intimacy should create great satisfaction between two lovers, however, it isn’t uncommon to feel a soul-sucking dissatisfaction. If you feel such dissatisfaction, even after great sex, it’s a sign you’re probably with the wrong person. You’ll continue to fill that emptiness until your mind finds the right thing that’ll fill it.
Being in love and feeling empty is a terrible combination as you may find it difficult to do the right thing, especially if it requires breaking off the relationship. Nonetheless, communicating with your partner will go a long way in resolving your problems.
The emptiness you feel might be a result of a missing piece in your love life. However, if communication doesn’t fill the hole, then ending the relationship is the next best step.
You’re not friends
Romantic relationships are a combination of love and friendship. Relationship experts advise that we form a bond of friendship before getting into a romantic relationship. A friendly relationship enables you both to talk about anything and everything, eliminating a suspicion of secrecy. A relationship built outside of friendship revolves mostly around sex, thereby, making it the sole and main purpose of the relationship.
Friendship enables people to consider you as part of their lives, and not just someone who satisfies an urge. For example, you’ll have a better relationship with a work colleague if you consider him/her a friend rather than another cog in the machine.
Ending the relationship is your best choice If you realize that you’re simply sex partners rather than lovebirds.
No emotional attachment
Sex without love leaves you wanting the basic things that a relationship has to offer. Number one is emotional support. Sex without love means running to others in your life for emotional support.
You’ll notice how your supposed romantic partner is never available during your time of emotional need but is the one to always initiate sex.
Love and emotional support should go hand in hand so if your partner isn’t providing you such support, then sex is what’s keeping them.
Sex trumps other things
Have you noticed how your partner doesn’t initiate other activities? Instead, you both spend all your time together in the bedroom, having sex. A normal loving relationship should consist of fun activities, including sex, but not limited to sex.
If your partner doesn’t show the same enthusiasm for other activities he or she shows during sex, then it’s obvious they’re in for the sex.
Is the person open to working on the relationship?
Every relationship requires conscious effort to grow. While sex will keep the relationship at a comfortable level, love will require that you both engage in difficult conversations to help further the relationship. If your partner is only interested in sex, he/she will avoid any uneasy conversation, never minding if it’ll destroy the relationship. If your partner doesn’t put effort into making your relationship work, then it’s time to move on.
Any sign of obsession?
Love endorses freedom and individual space. However, lust on the other hand can be selfish and obsessive. It takes your entire time, space, and energy unlike love, which does well to balance your life.
How does your partner correct your flaws?
Love is blind in the sense that it overlooks flaws and mistakes, only enunciating the positives. However, a partner who isn’t in love with you will criticize your every error, if not ridiculing your efforts.
A partner only interested in sex will quickly withdraw once a flaw is detected. So, check to see how your partner handles your flaws. If he/she doesn’t accept them, then that relationship has no love.
Conclusively, intimacy can be a sign of love as lovers tend to express their deep emotions during lovemaking. However, while lovemaking leads to sex, sex hardly leads to love. If your partner doesn’t love you, sex might still keep them around. You then must uncover the truth behind their intentions and act accordingly.