Relationships are complex and can often be characterized by various imbalances in power dynamics and give-and-take dynamics. Pop psychology has come up with several terms to describe these imbalances, such as overfunctioning/underfunctioning, narcissist/codependent, and caregiver/disabled care receiver, among others. These imbalances can lead to resentment, entitlement, and overall relationsickness when left unchecked.
In healthy relationships, giving and receiving should be reciprocal, with both parties feeling like they are benefitting fairly. However, when one person consistently gives more than the other, or when power dynamics are skewed, problems can arise. This imbalance can lead to relationsickness, affecting one’s physical, mental, and spiritual health.
In their upcoming book, “Relationsick,” authors Jeff Rediger and Lissa Rankin categorize unbalanced relationships into four levels to determine if they are receptive to healing and rebalancing, or if the imbalance is too severe to be compatible with good health.
Level 1 Relationships
Level 1 relationships involve one person with greater capacity caring for someone with less capacity, such as an able-bodied person caring for a disabled person. There is no obvious power imbalance, but differences in ability can create the perception of one. In these relationships, the focus should be on providing additional support for the caregiver to prevent burnout and promote healing.
Level 2 Relationships
Level 2 relationships are characterized by power dynamics such as one up/one down or giver/taker, without extreme manipulation or abuse. Healing in Level 2 relationships is possible if both parties are willing to work on rebalancing the power dynamics and addressing any underlying issues.
Level 3 Relationships
Level 3 relationships involve coercive control, a pattern of domination that strips the victim of their sense of freedom and self-worth. Healing from relationsickness in Level 3 relationships becomes nearly impossible due to the pervasive nature of coercive control.
Understanding the dynamics of unbalanced relationships and recognizing which level they fall into can help individuals determine if healing and rebalancing are possible. By addressing these imbalances and working towards healthier dynamics, individuals can improve their overall well-being and avoid relationsickness.
For more insights on relationships and how to navigate imbalances, consider joining the LOVE SCHOOL community to learn from experts in the field. Remember, prioritizing your own health and well-being is essential for maintaining fulfilling and positive relationships.
The impact of abuse in relationships is not always obvious by the volume or visibility of the abuse, but rather by the cumulative effect it has on one person’s will, choices, and identity. This dynamic, known as coercive control, can lead to a situation where an individual’s sense of self becomes increasingly restricted by fear, manipulation, or dependency.
Individuals who find themselves in relationships characterized by coercive control, which is common in cult environments, must prioritize removing themselves from the oppressive influence before they can begin to heal. Remaining in such a situation can keep the nervous system in a heightened state of alert, hindering the body’s ability to activate its natural self-healing mechanisms.
In more severe cases where criminal behaviors such as rape, assault, theft, fraud, and trafficking are involved, the relationship escalates to a Level 4 dynamic. Seeking professional help, involving law enforcement and legal support, accessing social services, and prioritizing safety are crucial steps in addressing Level 3 and Level 4 relationships. Only by removing oneself from these harmful environments can individuals begin to experience relief and allow their bodies to initiate the healing process.
Unbalanced relationships, whether romantic, familial, professional, or with a mentor or healer, can have detrimental effects on one’s well-being. These dynamics can manifest as physical or emotional illnesses, further emphasizing the importance of recognizing and addressing unhealthy relationship patterns.
Regardless of the nature of the unbalanced relationship, it is essential to seek support and understanding to promote optimal health and happiness. Exploring methods to heal these dynamics, such as attending LOVE SCHOOL gatherings, can provide valuable insights and tools for navigating challenging relationships and fostering personal growth.
For more in-depth discussions on healing relationship dynamics, consider joining LOVE SCHOOL and accessing past recordings for valuable resources and guidance. Embracing opportunities for learning and growth can empower individuals to cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships and lead a more balanced and harmonious life.